Text Box: Date:	Saturday July 7, 2007
Time:	5:00 pm - 8:00 pm
Location:    Portsmouth 
	     Masonic Temple
Text Box: RETIREMENT BONUS
The Navy found they had too many officers and non com's and decided to offer an early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who volunteered for retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in his body. The officer got to choose what those two points would be. 
The first officer who accepted asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000.  The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked out with $96 ,000.  The third one was a non commissioned officer, a grizzly old Chief who, when asked where he would like to be measured replied, "From the tip of my weenie to my testicles."  It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider, explaining about the nice big checks the previous two officers had received. But the old Chief insisted and they decided to go along with him providing the measurement was taken by a medical officer. The medical officer arrived and instructed the Chief to "drop 'em," which he did. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the Chief's weenie and began to work back. Dear Lord!" he suddenly exclaimed, "Where are your testicles?"  The old Chief calmly replied, Vietnam.
Text Box: Super Excellent Master

Page 7

Volume 6, Issue 6

Text Box: Tim Martin, Past Illustrious Master and Chaplain of Solomon Council #79, has announced that the Super Excellent Master Degree will be conferred at the Portsmouth Masonic Temple Saturday July 7, 2007.  Any Companion of Chillicothe Council #4 R. & S.M. who would like to receive this degree contact the Office of the Recorder at 740-774-3485 to have your name placed on the roster. An email will be sent as a reminder.
Text Box: TONIGHT IS LODGE NIGHT
1. He slowly opened the door to his locker. He hung his police uniform on the hooks and took out his suit. It was Lodge night. 
2. He watched as the last employee left his business, locked the building and made the evening bank drop. He then headed off with a whistle on his lips and a spring in his step. It was Lodge night. 
3. The young man helped his wife clear the table. He then said good night to his children and snuck into his room to change his clothes. Upon leaving he smiled at his wife and kissed her. It was Lodge night. 
4. It had been a hard day. Navigating through the complexities of the legal system was rewarding work. It was also tiring. Normally he would have been headed home for a relaxing evening. But tonight was not normal and he felt none of the usual fatigue as tonight was Lodge night. 
5. Life had not been pleasant since his wife died. His family lived far away and with each passing year it became harder and harder to do the simple things in life. And most of all he missed his life long partner. Tonight he felt a little less pain and life didn't seem nearly as bad. It was Lodge night. 
6. The accident had been terrible. But there was some consolation that his skills as a doctor had saved a life. Still it would not be easy and there were possibilities of complications. But for a while he could place his worries in the hands of others as tonight was Lodge night. 
7. It is hard looking for work when the job market is scarce. Each day he faced the nameless horde of people who continue to tell him that he was not needed. He faced rejection and the possibility of hardship at every turn. Tonight he knew he was wanted and needed, it was Lodge night. 
8. He sat alone in the small room wearing clothes that were not his. He had received warm welcomes from a number of men he didn't know and a few he did. Now with an ancient relic of a bygone age they told him to wait patiently, yet he looked forward to it with anticipation. It was his first Lodge night. 
9. From all walks of life we come. We donate our time to an age honored tradition. We donate our money to help those who cannot help themselves. We gather in fellowship and part in peace. For a while we can lay aside our differences and worries to bask in our shared experiences. We can talk with men who are our equals, men who work to better themselves. And we serve as mentors to our newly-raised Brethren
Tonight is Lodge night and I am glad I am a Mason. 
Author Unknown